I'M WHAT TIME AND CONSEQUENCE HAVE MADE ME

I've been surrounding myself with a lot of positive things lately. I don't really like blogging about my real feelings because it's either they're too personal or I'm too scared to let other people know because I know they'd judge me hehe. Anyhoo, I reconnected myself again in the art world! I'm so glad I did this. I felt like a noob for the past three months and it's depressing. I lived a hobo life because I was too sad and heartbroken to even function and use my brain to do productive things. It went on for about a month or two; it kinda felt like a routine for me. 

So then I started to get busy. I read a lot of art blogs, started watching art tutorials on youtube and wrote a lot of things for myself. This is where I thought about getting sober from all that sadness I gave myself in. Three months is short, yes, but it felt like three summers for me. Three summers of waiting over something that's never really going to happen. It's as if the universe is playing a big joke on me. But then I turned it all around started getting my shit together. It's like a do or die mission for me: I stay this way and die or get over myself and start living. I chose the latter, of course. 

I started writing again. I figured that keeping track of your life helps hehehe. 

I tried painting a face but then I failed miserably. I need more practice, meh. 

My attempt at making my journal look prettier, lol. Also my desperate attempt at covering up something real personal. 

I ABSOLUTELY LOVE WATERCOLOR PAPER! I realized that using watercolor paper is sooo much better than using normal paper because it actually holds up water. 

My best friends. I use the point-2 most of the time because it's small and helps me do the details better. Plus they're pink; I love them. 

I've been dwelling over this quote from Roald Dahl for the past few weeks now. This is my first piece using watercolor paper. I think this phrase has ~deeper meaning~ for me, lol. 

I would like to give myself a big pat in the back for these flowers. Made me love myself even more, HAHA. 

THIS PAINTING IS SPECIAL TO ME BECAUSE IT CLEARLY REPRESENTS HOW I REALLY FEEL. ONLY I WILL GET THIS. Or maybe you'd get this if you are smart enough. haha

I started to reading Bible passages lately and I don't know, it made me feel ~stronger~ and more capable of handling myself better than I did before. So, thank you, Jesus. You're the bomb. 

UGH. Look at that waste. It looks pretty but then I screwed it all up because I'm so DUMB. I tried redoing it but then...IT'S NOT THE SAME ANYMORE. The first one still looks better for me. But it's so dirty already I want to cry. 

So this is what I have been up to lately. It's so much better than moping around and feeling sorry for myself and getting sad. Of course the sadness is still there, but I'm learning how to handle it. I'm slowly moving, but at least I have made some progress. Looking back at what happened three months ago, I learned that I shouldn't regret it. Of course I'm not the only one who's affected here. (Or maybe I really am the only one affected in this situation). This summer evoked a lot of emotions from me. I'm still waiting, okay. 

I start college tomorrow. This is a big change for me. I'm scared, but I think I can handle myself well. 

Do or Die: Part I

A few weeks back, Sam and I went to La Salle to pass our college application forms. I woke up late and wow what's new. So then I went to Sam's place and we took off. On the way to Sam's mom's place we kept on muttering things like "oh my god we're so independent," "WOW COLLEGE" "so teenager of us". It felt so different and it's like we're taking a step forward into the future and then the next day, we'll be back in the past and blah blah blah. Long story short, we can't wait for college but we also don't want to high school to end. 

And so we were greeted by the buzzing and hustling of the jeepneys and the street vendors and the smell of street food. I can't help but think how Filipino I am in the future and every single moment I take the streets of Manila, an Up Dharma Down song plays. Anyhoo, we arrived in La Salle and ran into Lara, Erika, Maye, Reisha, Max and Paola. (DID I MISS SOMEONE OMG I HOPE NOT).

The fangirling commenced between Sam and I because this sight said to hello to us. It's so big I think it can be converted into a museum. And it felt a lot like New York to me, even though I've never been to New York. The pictures don't even give justice to how big and ~industrial~ it looks in real life.

riding the escalatorZZzz wooo

This is the i-don't-knowth floor of the building. (((Ideal place for photo shoots hehe)))

People, this is the Yuchenco Hall. Judging from the tarp welcoming you at the entrance, art runs everywhere in this building (I think so. LOL if not please don't sue me). I seriously stopped and clutched my chest. It's so beautiful hhhhhh. We wanted to enter the building and ~tour~ around but we were too shy because students crowded the area and we didn't want to look like we're intruding their space. We didn't want to feel like we're the feelingera frogs HEHE. 

But much to my dismay, I wasn't able to pass my forms because my recommendation forms were incomplete and I wanted to punch myself for seventy-eight times. But whatever at least I got to explore Taft with my best friend. 

WE HAD BON CHON IN U-MALL SO COOL. Sam bought me a bracelet weeee. (I have no picture but it's cute. Thank you, Samantha).

Bon Chon is love and love is real. We love Bon Chon. Bon Chon forever. Bon Chon amen.

This plastic bag is for Lara Ackermann.

And then the awesomest thing happened. We were walking down the road looking for a jeep when we found this alley full of graffiti. I turned my head right and I stopped and gasped like GASPED. And I screamed Sam's name and we entered the place despite the "no trespassers" sign. It looks like a parking lot to me but I don't think they fit in a parking lot where people park their cars or piss on the walls behind the bumper of their cars. I want the people of Taft Avenue to renovate this place and make it look like an art gallery. 

i lyk dis a lot

This unexpected moment make me want to restore my faith in humanity. 

We went to CSB and we were thinking about going inside. But since it's already late and the admissions office were closed, we ended up sitting in one of those little things in front of the building. 

We went back to Sam's mom's place and we were so amazed by how the trip took less than 15 minutes. No traffic, just love. 

And then Sam's cute mother took us to Glorietta, along with her brother. We had J.Co and it was great. It was my first time to have J.Co and it was so good I wanna cry. And we had these little chocolate shakes and it was also very good huhu God bless J.Co.

FREE DONUT I LOVE THE WORLD

In conclusion, I liked La Salle very much. 

(Teaser: this is just part I so clearly, there will be part II. Or III.)(If you care.) 

Vast Colors

In which I write about my weakness for illustrations and their wonderful..... wonders. It's been a while since I wrote something about ~*art*~ and I'm glad I've finally found the time to do something productive other than drowning myself in stacks of schoolwork (I am clearly exaggerating but then it's called "schoolwork" and anything school-related is stressing and tear-inducing especially if you're a graduating student). Anyway, I have found yet another incredible place full of illustrations. I don't know why I never really appreciated this artist back then I mean for hell's sake, I've been following this person on tumblr since day one--literally, no kidding. I have no idea how I stumbled upon his blog, I mean I liked his drawings so yeah click here, "I don't know what I'm doing who is this", and then I followed him. 

And then I found out that he's a Filipino and then I had feels for a moment because it's not everyday you find an illustrator who creates such vast strings of color and yadda yadda yadda. robcham is a great comics artist and I'm not just saying, I am telling. I'd love to have his life as an illustrator but I don't think I'm not fit for the job because I'm afraid I might run out of ideas and my boss will get mad and fire me and boom~ no job, no future, no joy. 

Anyway, take a good look at his illustrations and engulf yourself in the world of colors~ 

I personally like this one because I love Disney-Pixar movies. Then again, who doesn't? 

I believe he made this one for Erwan Heussaff's food blog, thefatkidinside. 

And he also does promotional posters for events! They're all so cool and colorful and so alive I think my system's going to release glitters and rainbows.

I saw Manix Abrera's name and I think I'm about to cry because he's one of my favorites along with Pol Medina huhu. It's just that it's so ~magical~ whenever you see/read something about your favorite people being friends with your other favorites YAY. 

You should really start following Rob Cham on tumblr because I have a strong feeling that if you don't, your dashboard will die of boredom and dullness. 

I really want to be like him when I grow up but I'm quite aware of the fact that sitting here in front of my laptop writing things about great people will be the only achievement I'll earn in the future. I can't wait. 

RAK 'EN ROL

I wasn't able to attend Manix Abrera's art workshop (which is very very sad). Today is the last day of the workshop and I can't help but think, "I could've been on the way home by this time from Ayala Museum if I attended the workshop" or "Okay I hate everything please go away, I am in a very emotional state don't talk to me". Yeah. The pains of loving art too much. 

Anyhoo, it has been my hobby to lurk around Mister Abrera's facebook page. And so the lurking started from "basic" to "rak en rol" to "hardcore." (Last Christmas break, I spent like 3 hours  reading comic strips. No shame.)

And I think it's time for me to share these wonderful , our of the universe works. RAK EN ROL MGA PARE! 

HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA THIS.

this is one of my favorites because during grade school, my classmates would have this kind of conversation wherein they're saying these cuss words like, "tang ama mo!" or "tang inumin mo wag milo!". Hahaha it's still very funny huhuhu.

HELLO TEACHERS! JOKE.

FAVORITE STRIP OF ALL!!!! HAHAHAHA THE FIRST TIME I SAW THIS WAS LAST YEAR AND IT'S STILL VERY FUNNY OKAY. AS IN SOBRA 

And yes, Mr. Abrera's new book! 

CLICK HERE --> KIKOMACHINEKOMIX